What Am I Doing Right?

Recently I was talking with a friend and describing all of the things I was doing wrong in my life. Patiently she listened as I told her about how I had been eating unhealthily, not meeting my goals with work, and avoiding important responsibilities. Finally, after I had exhausted us both and made my best argument for beating myself up, I was silent. She paused before speaking and then asked “What are you doing right?”

“What am I doing right”? That’s a damn good question and one I rarely stop to ask myself. My natural tendency is to focus on the things I am doing wrong and play that list over and over in my head. It reminds me of a story I heard in early sobriety. There was an auditorium full of people and there were two exits. If you chose to exit through the first door, you could just walk right out and go home with no problem. If you chose the second door, there was a man with a baseball bat standing there. Everyone that walked through this door would get hit on the head with the bat. Of course most people would choose to leave through the first door and walk away. Not me. I would choose the second door where the man stood with the baseball bat waiting to hit me on the head. If he wasn’t there - I would wait for him!

Changing the way I talk to myself and treat myself has been a process. It doesn’t come naturally. Looking at my progress on a chart towards my goals has never been a line slowly moving upwards. In fact, it has looked more like an out of control EKG. Comparing myself to others is my biggest downfall and self-sabotage technique. We all have different paths to reaching our goals and we all come out with our own personal and unique story to tell. It’s not supposed to look like anyone else’s story.

“What am I doing right’? This will be my focus today. Many of us have the belief that giving ourselves credit or speaking of our achievements is off-putting. It certainly can be if used to bring others down or stroke a damaged ego. However, it can be useful to those of us that associate any type of defect or flaw as a failure.

As I go through the day, I will acknowledge small acts of kindness and Godly thoughts. Taking stock of all character traits is an important part of a healthy mind. It’s so easy to get caught up in defects and then use that perceived failure as an excuse to give up. “What am I doing right?” When I can find a way to alter my thoughts about myself and accept I am neither perfect nor a failure, I have a more clear and direct path to God’s will and becoming what He intended me to be.

What are you doing right today?